A touring groupie!

 

After almost a year of being at home, December comes around like a stealthy ninja, and yet again another year is coming to an end. Time really does fly, right? My husband's tour dates are now done for 2014, and I've been so happy to welcome him home with open arms and a grateful heart - however, before he made it home for what promises to be a spectacular family Christmas, I decided to 'visit' the tour, as technically a groupie.

After spending a glorious evening with my oldest friend at her house in Bristol, I met up with my husband for a lovely night off in...Swindon. Yes. We then travelled from Swindon to Bristol, on to Cardiff, and then to Cambridge, and finally on to Portsmouth, on board the trusty (or sometimes not so trusty!) crew tour bus. The two buses the band and crew travel on are the buses of champions; there was a spare bunk for me for a few nights, and I was part of the nomadic travelling furniture once more.

Catching up with my touring buddies, and my wonderful girls - two of them shown above! - has been brilliant actually; I was a little apprehensive as I thought it would be bizarre, doing the miles but not the shows, and to be honest it was slightly strange and emotional, but I'm very glad I did it. The pride I felt when I watched the band perform at the different venues was palpable; I cheered and danced and boogied and sang along, waving my arms with energy and no doubt embarrassing other audience members as I went, but I didn't care. The music and the atmosphere carried me on, and I was so pleased to have been, and to still be, a part of this superb musical journey.

Having stepped off the touring rollercoaster, I had got a little bit of distance, and I realised that I had begun to recover. I could see the wear and tear taking its toll on my friends and colleagues, as well as my husband of course, and was happy to not be on that particular ride. It has rekindled a desire to sing on stage again though, and it's looking like I will be rejoining the band for some of their shows in 2015, which is a great thing. I wasn't expecting to feel like that, so it's definitely a bonus!

Everyone was so welcoming, generous and happy to see me (well, they acted like they were, anyway!) and it was a joy to see them all. It has rounded off the year nicely, as I still believe that I made the right decision to take a break at the beginning of 2014 and I'm excited about the future.

I do hope you all have a fantastic Christmas, and end your 2014 with bounce, verve and happiness. Look to 2015 with hopeful, grateful and loving hearts; dive in without fear, if at all possible. That's what I need to do!

 

Music, magic and memories

What an evening. Performance time for the choir of children I've been working with, the result of so much hard work by people involved with the local council's foster services and of course the shining stars that are the children themselves.

I tell you what; these children are without doubt some of the strongest, bravest and most inspirational young people that I have come across. They put their nerves aside, their feelings of perceived inadequacy or shyness; they resisted being stubborn, cocky or giggly; they learned their words, they looked into the faces of the crowd, and they used their own personal stories and experiences to enhance their performance. They rapped about life in care, in their own words. They danced, whilst singing about body image issues. They twirled batons, sang a cappella, dedicated songs to friends and family, and supported each other. They smiled at me from the stage, followed my lead and were pleased - at times ecstatic - with their achievements. 

I was so incredibly proud of all of them, every single one. They played an absolute blinder, and music reigned supreme, weaving its magic yet again. I was up on my feet by the end, clapping, dancing and laughing with the children as they owned the stage. Two weeks ago they were mumbling to their shoes, and tonight they threw it out there with verve and gusto. I can't tell you how much I loved my job tonight. What a fantastic, heart-rending and humbling experience I've had.

God bless those children, and the people who look after them. Simply wonderful.

Being in the moment

 

My friend Bryan took this photo of me in Burlington, Vermont, whilst we were on tour last year. It makes me happy; the water, the sense of space, the spontaneity of the jump, and the immediacy of the image. Capturing a moment. I know you can't see my face here, but I was grinning, and laughing. It was a beautiful day, breezy but bright, and the sun was reflecting off the water.

I was drawn to this photo today because of that moment, that snapshot. I read something that a good musician friend of mine had posted; it was an excerpt from an article by David Ackert, written for the L.A. Times, and it made sense to me:

"Musicians are some of the most driven, courageous people on the face of the earth. They deal with more day-to-day rejection in one year than most people do in a lifetime. Every day, they face the financial challenge of living a freelance lifestyle, the disrespect of people who think they should get real jobs, and their own fear that they'll never work again. Every day, they have to ignore the possibility that the vision they have dedicated their lives to is a pipe dream. With every note, they stretch themselves, emotionally and physically, risking criticism and judgment. With every passing year, many of them watch as the other people their age achieve the predictable milestones of normal life - the car, the family, the house, the nest egg. Why? Because musicians are willing to give their entire lives to a moment - to that melody, that lyric, that chord, or that interpretation that will stir the audience's soul. Musicians are beings who have tasted life's nectar in that crystal moment when they poured out their creative spirit and touched another's heart. In that instant, they were as close to magic, God, and perfection as anyone could ever be. And in their own hearts, they know that to dedicate oneself to that moment is worth a thousand lifetimes." 

How splendid, that this man has put his finger on one of the things that creative people feel, that you have to be wholly present and 'in the moment' to engage the spirit that drives you. Yes, it adds pressure, but the idea that you can make that moment count and dedicate yourself to it is an astounding thing. It makes it real, as you know that you cannot get that moment back, and in every moment you are the best you can be.

Free your mind

 

Happy weekend, everyone. Is it just me, or are the weeks flying by at the moment?! One minute it was Monday, I had my first yoga class in a LONG time, and then turned around to find it was Saturday. Maybe I'm just getting older!

So, without wishing to risk sounding like I'm jumping on the meditation bandwagon (hmm, those two words don't seem to fit together very well, maybe 'meditation safehaven' would be better...) I chose this week to start my meditation trial. I have always had difficulty relaxing - that is, in the true sense of the word, finding that space outside my racing mind to let my muscles release, breathe a huge sigh of relief, and not focus on either things I can't control or things that haven't happened yet. I am perfectly able to sit down quietly with a cup of tea and watch the world go by, but, like many others, my brain rarely allows me to switch off and just 'be'; I am always being, but with extras.

Hence the desire to include and welcome meditation into my life.

Being a complete novice, I followed the advice of a few friends and downloaded the 'Headspace' app, having also read Andy Puddicombe's refreshing and frank book about his experiences with meditation. I needed a low-pressure, low-expectation approach, and I have to say that I'm starting to like it already. Two days in. Who knows how I will feel after the ten-day challenge is up, but the most important aspect for me is that I've got off the starting block and found that precious ten minutes.

What were those song lyrics again? 'Free your mind, and the rest will follow'? Does that mean if your mind is free the rest of your whole self will follow, or that you can lie down and chill out, take a literal rest?! Maybe it's both..

Do you meditate? I'd love to know.

See you soon x

(Photo from AboutMeditation.com)

Exploring new ways

 

Happy weekend everyone! Today was very enlightening; new knowledge gleaned, new faces to talk to, shared laughter, plenty of tea, and lots of exercise for my writing muscles.

I attended a workshop entitled 'Writing for Magazines', led by a fabulous lady called Fiona Wright, and hosted by the wonderful Deb, at Retreats for You in Devon. Unfortunately I couldn't attend in person, so Fiona, Deb and four other lovely ladies very kindly entertained my cyber-face as I sat in my own kitchen, relying on Skype. It was almost as if I was there, minus Deb's amazing brownies and the Devonshire countryside.

I was pleasantly surprised by what I managed to achieve; I found that I had good ideas, some that I had been contemplating already but others that appeared through discussion with others, and planning; I left my doubts behind, and trusted that I could try to come up with some good stuff. Fiona was encouraging, intuitive and vibrant, with loads of exclusive tips to take away, and I learned about how to pitch, which is highly exciting for me!

By the time the workshop ended, we were all happily tired, and I'm so pleased that I signed up to do it. Isn't it true that sometimes all you need is a good nudge in the right direction, a bit of reassurance and some challenging exercises to get you moving along that path again? I think I had stopped to smell the roses and then forgotten the way..

How did you spend your Saturday? I'd love to know.

See you soon x

 

Music is freedom

 

In my life, if I had ever doubted that music is pure magic, I've had one of those days that would crush any such doubt. My heart was full to bursting when I came home from work today, and though I was exhausted, I felt a renewed joy in my passion for music.

I had a rehearsal - the first one - with a group of children, at a great youth centre in a town near where I live. The group was varied, with boys and girls of different ages, and they are all to be respected, applauded and cherished. They have a hard time every day, all with separate stories to tell, and their characters are occasionally difficult to fathom, but they are supportive of each other, fiercely loyal and eager to try new things, with a little bit of encouragement.

Some arrived full of energy, chattering and jumping about; others were quiet, almost hiding away in corners, full of nerves, and one was very angry, frustrated and stubborn. I sipped my tea and prayed that their first choir practise would be a success, and above all that they would get something out of it.

So we started to sing.

Their voices rose in the room; they were smiling, and following the words.

Then they showed what they had been working on, as individual acts for their concert, and there was singing, dancing, rapping and even some baton twirling; each person had something that they wanted to show the world, and gradually each made it onto the makeshift 'stage' to perform, tackling nerves and shyness, and bouncing off the support shown by their peers.

Hearing them singing together, a little merry band, made my heart sing. It seemed that, even momentarily, they could forget everything and just express themselves, and watching them was brilliant.

I sat down this evening feeling so proud, and happy just to be part of the work they're all doing.

Music really is pure magic.

We will remember them

 

We will remember them, and they'll be in our hearts for ever.

On a sunny day this year, whilst on holiday, my husband and I were walking around Wick, in northern Scotland. It's a place we both like very much, and we have visited several times over the years, in all weathers, to look at the harbour, go to our favourite spot for tea and cake, walk the streets and stock up on camping supplies. It is a unique place, with its slightly bleak face, grey buildings and quiet roads, but its story is really rather interesting, and my family have history there.

We had a free day, and were looking for something to do, so I decided to try and go on a family treasure hunt; I wanted to know more about the family members that had lived in that chilly and unforgiving corner of Scotland, and see what I could find to make them real in my mind. So I called my wonderful grandmother in Sussex.

As I walked, she gave my husband and I some vital information to go on - birth dates, marriage locations, names - and led us on a brilliant tour of the town. She is a veritable font of knowledge, and so when we went the lovely archivist at the library, I found - amongst others - my great-great uncle, Magnus Swanson.

Yes, Magnus. Amazing.

Magnus was a soldier with the Black Watch, the Royal Highlanders, and not only was he a soldier but he was also in charge of a platoon during the First World War. At just 27 years old, he took his men over the top at Passchendaele, and was killed in action on October 12th 1917. He was my grandmother's uncle, and until that day in Wick, I didn't know that he even existed.

However, now I do, and we found his name on the War Memorial in Wick, proudly displayed. It was an emotional moment; all those brave men, giving everything to give others a future. He may just be one of many, but he's our one, and I'm so glad that we found him.

God bless them all.

Rolling hills, rolling words

 

Happy Monday! I trust you've all had a super weekend, and that your new week began with a sparkly day today.

I got home less than two hours ago after a brief glimpse of the the bright lights of London, and having spent a most joyous, cosy and unusual few days tucked away in a rather lovely cottage, right in the heart of the Cotswolds. I went with a lovely friend of mine, a fellow writer and all-round super person whom I have known for seventeen years (gulp!) and we were laughing in the car on the way out to the house as it wasn't far at all from where we grew up - a weekend away in a place we actually know very well! I didn't, however, know the village that we were visiting, and it was truly beautiful. We were lucky with the weather on two of the three days, and I took the above photo yesterday morning, looking out from the garden across the rolling Cotswold hills. Stunning.

So, the weekend was about writing, so write we did; we also managed a decent walk around the village, I did a slightly comical run around the house in my slipper socks (I didn't want to abandon my newly-found exercise regime for too long!), there was a trip to some delightful local places, including the amazing Broadway (two words: film set!) and several bottles of bubbly, as well as a homemade roast dinner, risotto and a blazing open fire. I found that, at the end of Sunday, I had added nearly 5,000 words to my word count, and for me that is real progress! A little space, a little luxury, a great friend and some yummy food can make all the difference. I found a spark, some confidence, some peace; I felt like I was writing with conviction, and got quite emotional several times. Cheesy, you may think, but I revel in that connection with my book; I love to feel like I'm breathing life into my characters, and I got a chance to flesh out some of those sections that I had been looking forward to cracking on with. I can't tell you how proud I felt when I realised I'd got underway with it all again.

I've come home with a renewed motivation, so this week will be spent focusing on continuing with my book. Hurrah! Better catch up on Downton Abbey tonight so that I can knuckle down tomorrow..

What gives you that spark, that fire? I'd love to know.

See you soon! x

Writing, some singing, and more writing..

 

Happy Thursday to you all, and I do hope that your week is progressing swimmingly! For the past couple of days I have been having to enter the Christmas realms, rather earlier than usual (I try to not think about Christmassy stuff until the last week of November as a general rule, but sometimes needs must!) The reasoning behind this break from the norm is a brand new venture - a choir for children at a local youth centre, and their upcoming Christmas performance.

I have been brought in as choir leader and coach, and it's going to be superb fun; the children are always a delight, and they get very involved in their individual pieces for the show. I went through a mountain of Christmas songs to find some suitable backing tracks for the choir to sing together, so my festive mood is well and truly on a roll now! In the end, I have picked 'Merry Christmas Everyone' by Shakin' Stevens (classic) and the legendary song that is 'Merry Xmas Everybody', by Slade. If that doesn't get everyone dancing in the aisles then I don't know what will!

So, the first choir rehearsal is tonight, and then tomorrow I head off to London to meet a wonderful old friend so that we can disappear to a beautiful cottage in the Cotswolds for three days' worth of chatting, walking, but most of all, WRITING. I am chomping at the bit to go! It should be highly productive, as the surroundings will very definitely lend themselves to inspiration, with rolling hills visible from every window and everything we could possibly need inside. I am BEYOND excited! Writers need a little escape now and again to find that spark, gain some fresh perspective and indulge their creative side, and having my friend there will be the icing on the cake. Glasses of wine by the fire, home-cooked food and fresh air. Heaven.

So, have a wonderful weekend. Why not indulge yourself a little, if you can? Spend a few hours doing something you really love to do, and brighten up the November weather with the light within..

What are your passions? I'd love to know.

Before you go, check out this beautiful hideaway in Snowdonia (saving up for this next year!)

How about this fabulous winter coat?

Have an enchanted festive treat at the Somerset House ice rink!

See you soon x

Halloween, fireworks and lots of trees..

I hope those of you who enjoy the quirks of Halloween had a superb time this year. I went out with my parents! We dressed up, and made a very eccentric and scary sight as Ghouldilocks (me), Morticia Addams crossed with Alice Cooper (my lovely stepmum) and what could only be described as a Ringmaster (Dad). It was a delight. We trooped to the village pub, had a few drinks and a dance, and came home to wipe off the makeup!

Saturday was pure joy, with delectable sunshine and a bright blue sky, so we went to Westonbirt Arboretum. The colours were really starting to change, and as there was still greenery to be found, we got a full spectrum of greens, browns, yellows, oranges, reds and pinks. Quite spectacular. Follow that with a bonfire and fireworks on a local playing field, wrapped in a scarf with a glass of mulled wine, and the day was complete.

I had a grand time playing and singing for shoppers at the Burford Garden Company yesterday, with lots of kind people coming up to chat, and got to speak to my husband via Skype after watching Downton Abbey - yes!!

How was your weekend? I'd love to know.

Family time and bridesmaid shopping

Yesterday, I joined a group of ladies for a what promised to be a civilised shopping trip to the retail mecca known as Meadowhall, just outside Sheffield. The brief: to head out into the aforementioned mecca in search of four purple bridesmaid dresses for four beautiful girls. The group: My lovely mother-in-law, two sister-in-laws and one sister-in-law-to-be, and four beautiful girls, aged between six and (almost!) thirteen.

At half-term. In a HUGE shopping mall.

It was really rather tiring almost immediately, mainly because our search was fruitless for the first hour or so, and we needed lunch; however, things soon picked up when we spotted some very acceptable dresses by John Rocha - and they were purple!

Cue fitting room antics, 'oohs' and 'ahhs', and excited clapping from the bride-to-be..

And finally, we walked away with not only three of the four dresses needed, but when we got to the till we discovered that the dresses were on sale for 75% OFF.

75%!!

What a bargain. Smiles all round, high fives, and then a swift trip to a certain fast food outlet for a quick food stop, before hitting the LEGO store, the Disney store, Claire's Accessories, Lush and TK Maxx, and pausing for one of the beautiful girlies to have a bounce on the trampoline bungee. As you do.

We had left before 4pm, having had more than enough of the shops, and feeling pretty exhausted!

It is days like that, though, that can give you some of the nicest memories; though stressful at the time, it's so important to spend those hours together, with a wedding in sight. My nieces won't be this age for long, and I just adore them, all of them. I love that they want to hold my hands, and show me what they've bought with their pocket money. I love that I was able to buy my gorgeous almost-teenage niece a birthday present that she actually wanted. And I love that I got to be part of the trip, to be one of the ladies that shop.

Do you enjoy shopping? Do you crave the rush of that new purchase, or run screaming from anything retail-related? I'd love to know.

Shaking off the sad face

A very quick post to say how excited I was at just how effectively some of my favourite comedy episodes - combined with eight spoonfuls of Ben & Jerry's 'Joy to the Swirled' ice cream (yes, I did count!), a couple of decent cups of tea, a roaring fire, my cosy slipper socks and a brand new home and interiors magazine - have shaken off my slightly sad and miserable mood. I always miss my husband dreadfully when he has to go away for work, and it invariably takes me a little while to adjust to the quiet, especially on the first day. 

Cue 'Miranda'. 

For those who haven't seen it, please watch it. For those who have and didn't like it, fair play, it's probably not everyone's cup of Earl Grey. However, for me, someone who adores silliness, enjoys the ridiculous and can relate to 'not quite fitting in', this is the perfect cure for melancholy. Miranda, I salute you; I just love you. 'Such fun!'

What do you do to get out of a grump? I'd love to know.